What am I waiting for?

Well, I will type this post in English. For what? I don't know. But sometimes I feel easier to express in another language, not my best-of-all-time Vietnamese anymore. I don't know why, is that because I'm living far away from home? Or is that because of Foreignalisation???

Vietnamese is told to be so complicated to learn and to use as well. It's an art in using Vietnamese to express not only exactly but also lively what you want to say. English is more simple and easy-going as well. Don't need to choose, don't need to be confused, just...let it go!

Feel like not many people go to visit this place of mine. Even it's not what I expected when I create this blog, but now I start feeling that is not a bad thing actually. I'm really needing a place where I can write freely about my feelings, my emotions, my story and...blah blah...

Time passes by, I keep my love on him dull and lasting. I know, a guy like him will be tired of this such of love soon, but I cannot do anything else coz I'm also tired. But I will never give up on him, I think so.His love...it's not what I ever expected. It's not strong, it's not romantic, it's even not like a love itself. Long time no love, I feel like that when I'm in love with him...But why I still keep going even I know it maybe lead nowhere?

"Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavements, even if it leads nowhere..."

Chasing pavements - Adele's song keeps playing in my complicated head and heart.

Darling, just tell me that I can lean on you...just say that your love is not a lie and you don't give it to me because you feel like only me that kind to you. It's not like that, right?

I just want to leave these all behind and keep concentrating in my study. But coz I'm just a little girl who try to keep a big love in her two small hands.

And love sometimes is a silly game. And both he and I have been tired of playing such that games. But I never consider him a game...

He is my love...

Baby, I know you know how I feel. But you never say anything to show that you understand. You just keep silent, doing things like I'm nothing. And I just stay here, keep waiting like a silly stupid girl.

What should I do?
How can I live?
When will you tell me...

I'm tired, really
And I want to lean on you...